Swedish girls vs. English girls

Or should I say Swedish nightclubs vs. English nightclubs? Check the slideshow below and you will see why. The first part is really awsome, but the second part is what you were really waiting for!


Where do I want to go tonight?

Sweden, Sweden, Sweden!!!

Ok, let's face it: This slide show is not objective, but there is some truth in it. Sweden has some of the most gorgeous women, while England is not very famous to be a hottie-paradise. In fact, in my country, there's a common cliché, that English women are ugly. I don't like these kind of generalizations, they're baseless and shallow. I'm sure England has many beautiful women. But when it comes to looks, I prefer Swedish ladies over English, because I think naturally blonde women are über hot. How about you? What do you prefer, English babes or Swedish beauties? :)

Have a lovely weekend!

Sex with a horse? Are you nuts?

Disclaimer: I may curse. Sorry.

[Photo from Colombiamoda]

Where the fuck is this world going? Seriously! Are you kidding me? Nothing makes sense anymore! It's getting weirder and sicker. I better avoid watching news at all. I'm cocooning today and the next years. I need a fliter for internet to just filter out this mad sick world we're living in. I only want good news. I want to read about sane people. Because this made me sick:

• Lubna Hussein from Sudan, who was arrested July 3 for wearing pants and is now standing trial, openly defied the court by wearing the very same outfit to trial that she was arrested for. (source) [Lubna is my new hero!]
  

• A South Carolina man was charged with having sex with a horse after the animal's owner caught the act on videotape, then staked out the stable and caught him at shotgun point. But this wasn't the first time the man has been charged with buggery: He pleaded guilty last year to having sex with the same horse after owner Barbara Kenley found him in the same stable and was sentenced to probation and placed on the state's sex offender list. (source) [Sick bastard! OMG! Sick bastard!]
  

• The conservative TV host Glenn Beck said that President Barack Obama had "over and over again" shown himself to be "a guy who has a deep-seated hatred for white people or the white culture," later adding, "I'm not saying he doesn't like white people, I'm saying he has a problem ... This guy is, I believe, a racist." (source) [A white supremacist calls Obama racist. LOL.]
  

• A woman in Texas killed her own baby and ate parts of his brain. The scene was so gruesome investigators could barely speak: A 3½-week-old boy lay dismembered in the bedroom of a single-story house, three of his tiny toes chewed off, his face torn away, his head severed and his brains ripped out. When police entered, the woman screamed: "I killed my baby! I killed my baby!". She told officers the devil made her do it, police said. (source) [This is just so sick, I am speechless!]
  

I can't be sick all the time. I need to survive and I need to find a reason that my existence makes sense. At least some sense. Because sometimes it's just so fucked up that I don't have the willpower and the phisical strength to bear another day. I'd just like to vanish and say: "That's all, folks. I'm out. Bye."

How about you? Do you have the same feeling sometimes? Spew out your anger with me!

Guest Blogger: Kim Jong-il

Hello fellow friends and readers of My Kafkaesque Life. It's the Dear Leader, Kim Jong-il. I am writing instead of MKL today. Thank you, MKL, for giving me the chance to be the 1st guest blogger on your respectful site.

I want to talk about current events around the world and my personal life in the past week. Let me say first, that I became sick and permanently constipated, because of the Great Satan's pig flu, that was spread around the world from his Mexican brother to destroy Korea. Our government strengthened safety measures and took all the needed precautions to make sure that the great Korean nation is safe. If pig flu becomes wide spread in our country, we will bomb Hawaii! Or just Japan. Death to the Great Satan!

Let me tell you how my week passed. It was really a week full of lovely events. I went to the Korean national sunglasses fair. I was the only one attending and I bought all the models. When I was home, I went online and read about Lady Gaga. She has revealed recently, that she used to tone down her crazy look when she was teased about it in high school. I was shocked! Because I thought she was a rebel like me. I never toned down my look. Only recently, when I lost a lot of weight and now I look a little skimpy. I miss that sack o'potatoes around my waist, it made me look like a Yakuza boss, the women loved it. But sadly, the debauched days of reckless sexual and culinaric greed are over. Lil Jongy does not work anymore. That's why I am writing memoirs and watching reruns of Golden Girls the most of my day. I am delighted though, that today I was able to scribble this little post. It was hard to sit still. Wait... I'm feeling something's moved. A muscle is suddenly feeling lose. I have to go.

Thank you, dear readers of MKL. I may write a regular column on this blog from now on.

Dear Leader, Kim Jong-il

[NOTE by MKL: I don't think so.]

[Photo: NK Ministry of foreign affairs]

Korean friends in Ljubljana

Being a guide for the second day

Monument to Rudolf Maister, our general.

This was my second day as tour guide for my Korean friends. It was Sunday and I was about to show them our capital city Ljubljana. I came to Ljubljana in the afternoon, around 3pm, because they were visiting our beautful Bled. So we met at the trainstation and then headed towards the centre. The city was virtually empty. The only people left were tourists. It was hot and dry, so it was quite tiring to walk so much. But anytime I asked them, if they want to see some building that was a bit far off, they said yes.

Zavarovalnica Triglav building, designed by Plečnik.

The highlight was Ljubljana's Old town and the castle. While walking around thru the old narrow streets, I saw trouble ahead. There was a bunch of people, maybe 2 or 3, on bikes and one of them was shouting and harrassing passers-by. He had a golf club in his hand. And guess what? He was a skinhead. Now imagine I pass by with four Koreans. Luckily I saw a street on the left and I started walking faster and telling some stories to them, to distract them. Those assholes became louder and louder and I was afraid that they might follow us. Luckily they didn't. I remember that while these Koreans were in Austria, they told me someone look at them strangely and they didn't like it there. Then you can imagine how nervous I was that maybe some idiot says or does something stupid. Fortunately, everything was fine. Later I asked them, if they saw any people who would look at them strangely here. They said no. Pheeewww... I was relieved. Then we went up on the castle and they snapped some nice panoramic photos of Ljubljana.

Miklošičeva street.

The time for my departue came nearer. I had to go back home at 19.45, if I took some other train, it would be a very slow train and I'd come home late. And they were tired, too. So while we walked back to the train station, there was this girl like 50m infront of us. She was walking very slowly in high heels, she had shorts and a black yet transparent shirt on. Her body was amazing, I thought she was a model... and how he butt swung... wow... We were walking faster than her, so we caught up with her near the train station. All of us were waiting for the green light and I saw that she was checking us out. Maybe we were just a funny group: 4 Asians and a white guy, talking in English. Anyway, we crossed the road faster and the guys were hungry, so we went straight to McDonald's. 1 min later, she was in there, too. Maybe just a coincidence. The guys ordered some big menues, while she just ordered a small burger and sat very close to our table (hmm, I wonder). Eric said: She's hot. I said: Yea. Eric is the oldest one, he's the only one who smokes. He looks like a cool guy who would pick up a girl. Well, they were so busy with food and I busy with them, that the girl left and nobody, besides me, noticed. So Eric suddenly wondered: Where is she? She's gone, I replied. He was disappointed. Well, I never asked, if he would talked to her, but he might. We'll never know now.

Anyhow. After McD, we went for a beer and chatted like 1h. It was fun. They told me a lot about Korea and I told them things about Europe. Time just flew by and we had to say good bye. They told me they had a great time in Slovenia, better than expected and they thanked me a lot. It made me feel good that I was appreciated. But we had to part and I was kindly invited to go to Korea next time. I hope I will, because I always wanted to go (Update: And I did!).

Some more photos from that day:

Nebotičnik.

The Franciscan church.

The old railway station of Ljubljana. A new one is being built.

From left to right: Hwan, Eric, Justin and Peter.

What happened after the trip: Interestingly, Hwan (actually Kim Tae-Hwan), who was my friend for many years, suddenly unfriended me, when he returned back to Korea. It didn't happen right after the trip, but gradually over the summer and autumn of 2009. We were still fine in September, but in October he became distant and started to blame me for some things. It was right at that time, where I met my current girlfriend Lily and spent more time with her online and less with him. I thought a friend would understand that, but apparently, he didn't. He slowly blocked me in his emails, Twitter and Facebook (as Patrick Kim). He also kept changing his Western name from Shayne to Patrick to Simon... He deleted his blog, locked all profiles and stopped replying to all my questions. First I was surprised and didn't know what was going on, then I begged him to give me an answer why is he doing that, then I was angry and tried to spite. But I guess I never really got over this weird move. He adored me, called me hyong (big brother), he was so happy to meet and he promised me to guide me in Seoul, if I come to visit. Then he suddenly unfriends me and pretends like I don't even exist! And I was so nice to him, tour guided him around Maribor and Ljubljana, drove him and his friends around and even treated them few times. I don't regret that at all, but I would expect a little respect from him. Before going to Seoul this May, I begged him to meet me and to help me find my way. Guess what? He just ignored me. Just ignored and pretended I don't even exist and I went to Korea just to meet him. All his promises from the past faded away. And he tries so hard to have a good face (especially at AISEC Korea, where he's active), but what he did to me was beyond disgraceful. I'm still disappointed.

Read about guiding Korean friends in Maribor here>>

[All photos by MKL, 2009]

Why do we need blog awards?

I don't get it. The intergalactic dear leader Xenu approved a blog award that was sent to my blog via alien technology. I logged in to my Blogger account and there it was: The pink banner with the dearest words ever said to me (check the pic on the left). But what is wrong with me? Why do I not appreciate blog awards, be it given to me or to some other blogger? I've seen 'homemade' blog awards (unlike the one Xenu sent me of course!). I've seen blog awards on blogs that made me cringe and throw up at the same time (you Texan know, which one I am talking about!) and yeah, I came to the conclusion that these awards are not worth half a dime. Let me explain why:

1. There's no blog award show on TV: I think every award should be given in a show that is broadcasted on prime time TV. The blogger should have a speech prepared, where he thanks his parents, God (obviously!), the blog hosting service and its CEO and all the other bloggers that inspired him.
2. Bloggers give the award to each other: And then they put a banner on the side bar. Wouldn't it be more objective, if a team of linguists, literature historians and IT specialists examined the blogs and judged them by their language use, content and design? Or would that be too far, because after all, good blogs are fairly subjective matters?
3. Good blogs are fairly subjective matters: An awarded blog can be the best blog in the world for someone or the shittiest blog for someone else (pardon my French).
   
4. Blog award banners are all kinds of size: That's why when you have many of these banners on your side bar, it destroys the design and as points 1, 2 and 3 exposed, it does not mean anything.
5. Blog awards are abused for posts: I've noticed that every blogger who gets an award blogs about it. Ok, I was also blogging about Xenu's blog award that I recieved today, but that's different. I don't abuse this award for a 'filler', because I ran out of ideas (check my archive, duh!). Nope. I'm using Xenu's blessings to expose all the other fake blog awards. If any, it's the Xenu's intergalactic web award that's worth an undamaged dime.
   

I spoke. Did you take notes?

Do you have a filthy mind?

I just love stuff like this! Made me LOL.



Have a happy weekend!

MKL

Korean friends in Maribor

I will be a tour guide for the first time today

Today I will be a tour guy for 4 Koreans, who visit my hometown Maribor. I know one of them from the internet, the other 3 are his friends. They are all students between 20 and 24 years old. They decided to backpack across half of Europe, starting in Seoul and flying to Prague. Then they stayed three days and went on to Vienna, where they stayed two days. After that, they came to Graz, that was yesterday. Today they'll cross the Austrian border and come to Maribor. It will be in the afternoon. They'll be here only 4 hours. Luckily the town is small and we will have just enough time to see the main sights. Well, nice. I just saw it started to rain. I hope it'll stop by the time they're here. It's no fun walking around in umbrellas...
I hope they will have a good time here. I've never been a tour guide to people who came from so far and I don't really know them. I showed my ex around the town, that's all. But a group? Nope. Not yet. It will be an interesting experience and I will blog about it after I return from the tour.

Maribor's cathedral stolnica.

Gosposka street, Maribor.

Wow, they came earlier as expected. 3h earlier. I wasn't ready, so when they called me, I said I needed like half an hour. I had to take a quick shower, dress up and rush off to town. There they were at the train station with lots of back packs. We said hi, stuffed luggage in our Ford Focus and the trunk was just big enough. Then I drove them to our biggest shopping mall, where I could park my car for free. After that we went on the sightseeing tour across Maribor. I guess I was good, because I planned that we make one big circle around the whole center and inclueded all the main sights. They snapped a lot of pics, the weather was a bit cloudy, but sometimes the clouds would go away and it became very hot with a blue sky. It was hot for them, but they like it for snapping photos. They were impressed and told me that they didn't expect Maribor or Slovenia to be so nice. They were impressed with our main attraction: The 400 years old vine, the oldest vine in the world. After we saw that, I treated them some beer and we relaxed in the shade. We had some nice conversations, I guess it served me well that I know many things about Korea, which made them crack up few times. Time went by so fast. After beer, we set off back to the shopping mall. I kept telling them about Maribor's history and they liked it. While we were walking on the street, I took out my handphone and played some Lee Hyo-ri mp3s and some other Korean songs, which made them laugh out loud.

Castle square/Grajski trg.

Back in the mall, I helped them buy some stuff and then I asked them, if they want to eat something. I was hungry, I skipped lunch, so they followed me. I kept asking them to tell me where they wanna go, but they always followed me. That's what I call a very easy to handle tour participant, hehe. Anyway, we went to that restaurant where you put together your own menu, it's part a buffet and part where you order the main dish. It was funny when all four of them looked at those chicken drums and sausages and had to decide what to pick. The cook explained to me what is everything and I translated. Took us five people about 5 or more minutes, there were some people lining up behind us. But once 1 ordered something, another one wanted same and it went fast from there on. So we ate a while and then just chatted from Korean to world politics, from travel to recession and Korean girls. I got some nice info about the latter. I asked them, whether Korean girls were hard to please, they replied unanimously: Yes! Oh boy, that's bad. I asked: Why? They said they always want to be treated, wherever you go. They want to be like princess, so you need to buy stuff for them and everytime you go out, you need to drive them back to their front door. And then I added: Are they generally loyal? Again, an unanimous no. Oh, boy, that's bad again. I told them, that they basically shattered my whole image on Korean girls. They laughed and I had to ask again, was it really that bad? Well, aparently one guy was cheated by his ex, but he said that not all are as bad (of course I know that). Times have changed in Korea and now you probably don't have any security, same as in the West. I also asked if there's many Westerners having Korean girls and they said yes. I asked why is that. First answer was: Westerners are big. And not shy. Well, these guys were small and seemed a bit reserved at the first glance. But they were pretty cool when we got to know each other better. So, after the relaxing conversations, I drove them back to the train station and they gave me this gift (see pic on right). I unvrapped it at home, it's a nice Haruhana memo pad with some very artsy pics.

I can't use it, it looks too nice to be spoiled by my scribblings. They also gave me a pin with some buddhist symbol, I don't know. I will ask what it is. I will probably go to Ljubljana tomorrow, to show guide them there.

They gave me tons of compliments, I guess that made me feel good.

Read about guiding Korean friends around Ljubljana here>>

[All photos taken by Hwan, 2009]